Booze Free in Music City

And just like that, a year has gone by without drinking any alcohol. I have made it one trip around the sun without drinking. A year ago, I never imagined I’d be standing in this place today. I had no intention of quitting drinking. I just needed a break. My last day of drinking alcohol was March 31, 2024. I knew I wanted my break to start on April 1^st, and I wanted that last day to enjoy some day-drinking. I had some family in town, and earlier in the day I took my Mom and her husband to the Country Music Hall of Fame, and when they wanted to go back to the hotel my stepbrother and his girlfriend wanted to check out Broadway. I took them to Hampton Social and Lainey Wilson’s bar for the rooftop. I remember by the time we got to Hampton Social, my body was craving a mimosa. I always start my day off with coffee, but when I was drinking alcohol, I was definitely feeling my body craving it.

I had that feeling of craving mimosa bubbles and champagne on a work trip too, back in November 2023. I was traveling by myself, for a week, and I had something to drink every single day. For meals on territory visits, I can expense food, but I can’t expense any alcoholic drinks. I used to see this as a positive- I’m saving money on the food, so why not treat myself to a drink? But also, if I was by myself why was I needing to get a drink or two? I remember one day in particular ordering a mimosa at lunch- I didn’t see it as being a big deal, and I was paying for it, but a colleague and I hopped on a Zoom call to discuss something, and he seemed shocked that I was having a mimosa during the workday. Somedays I look back at this and think, “was that really that big of a deal?” but at the same time, that work week is one of the reasons why I wanted to take a month-long break from drinking in the first place.

Back to the last day of myself drinking alcohol- we didn’t get drunk, I didn’t have an embarrassing last day of drinking, and I didn’t hit a rock bottom. If my memory serves me correctly, I think we also met back up with my parents and I took them to El Fuego Mexican restaurant in East Nashville. I don’t think I had any additional drinks there, but I feel like I was a little fuzzy by the time we got there. I hate having that feeling around my Mom. All I can say is I went to bed that night and woke up to the first day of the rest of my life.

Here is a list of the Top 10 things I’ve learned since I stopped
drinking alcohol a year ago:

1. Just take it day by day– I once again had no intention of quitting drinking. After my first 30 days, I wanted to keep it going and it really just boiled down to individual days turning into to a larger number of days.
2. My friends were more understanding than I ever imagined– and that helped me to continue to not drink- I haven’t really lost any friends since making this choice. Are there some people that I’ve drifted apart from? Yes, but I’d say 99.9% of people have been cool and supportive. Conversely, I’ve also had to be okay and respectful with friends still choosing to drink. And I’m okay with that.
3. I didn’t end up getting a jolt of energy or discovering a new love for running- weirdly enough, I stopped drinking Coca-Cola back in my 20’s and that’s when I experienced the jolt of energy I had never experienced before. I replaced my love of Coca-Cola for coffee, and I don’t know if it was that, but I was also going to Barry’s Bootcamp, and working out more and started to shed some weight. Nowadays, I’m just trying to make it to another day. I already have a love for working out, but my workouts are to maintain the body I have. I hate running, and don’t anticipate this becoming something I take on. I am also busy with my full-time job, side hustles and content creating, so if anything, I just try to make sure I’m balancing rest more than anything else.
4. You can still get a buzz without the hangover that alcohol brings– discovering this is what I believe has helped me to be steadfast in my ability to continue with my alcohol-free path. Like I mentioned before, I loved drinking mimosas. I loved day-drinking. I loved that feeling I’d get of being bubbly and giggly during the day and having that buzz. Even more, I loved when I was able to take a disco nap with those mimosa bubbles running through my veins. Now, I know there are alternative ways to get a buzz without the hangover. November 2023 was the first time I had interacted with someone who didn’t drink when they were out on the town, but took gummies instead. I went to a concert with a date, and he bought me a glass of wine, but he said he wasn’t a big alcohol drinker. However, he loved gummies. I had a gummy and one glass of wine, and the concert was awesome. Since then, and honestly since discovering drinks like Cali Sober- I realized that alcohol just wasn’t the thing for me. I used to get terrible hangovers, and if anything, all I wanted was a buzz- every so often- but I am not looking to have a hangover ever again. It’s okay to admit that alcohol doesn’t agree with your body, and that you found something else that works better for you.
5. I needed an unwavering purpose to keep me going- back in December 2024, I don’t want to say I was lost but I knew I needed a new sense of purpose to help me continue with my alcohol-free path. I remember telling a few people I was considering going to AA or Recovery Dharma, but anyone I talked to said I didn’t need it. Now, anyone who needs or wants to seek the help of those groups absolutely should, but that wasn’t part of my journey. There was a week in mid-December where I led a Bar Crawl on a Saturday, and one of the participants asked me how I was able to stop drinking and still be out with a group of people on Broadway. I remember he had a beer in his hand, and he said he didn’t drink during the week but didn’t even want to drink the beer he had in his hand, and was doing it because he didn’t know how to be out with others without drinking alcohol. Then, at a Holiday party someone came up to me and asked me how I was able to stop drinking and keep it up- that’s when I realized I was doing something other people were trying to figure it in their own lives too- and they wanted advice. It also dawned on me that I was following a sober Nashville Content Creator, but I never saw her posting about mocktail menus or offerings at local bars and restaurants around town. That’s when I knew I had found my purpose. On my personal social media page, I’m what they call a “millennial lurker”. I don’t post all that often, and I had never edited a video on my phone or created a reel- but if others wanted to know how to stay alcohol-free, in Nashville, then I was going to figure it out and show them how ❤
6. Why yes, you could technically say I’m now raw-dogging trauma- I have my good days, and I have my bad days. I have days where I’ve laughed and feel like I’m on the top of the world, and I’ve had days where I’ve felt anxious. I’ve also had days where I’ve had panic attacks. I’m experiencing all of the emotions that life throws at you. For all of these things, I talk to my mom, I talk to a Therapist, I write, I go for walks, I go to yoga, I work out, I take a bath, or I go to bed. I’ve even had days where I call my Mom and rant about something I’m frustrated about, and she tells me I need to take a nap and start the day over. It’s all happening, but I know I have a great support team and a great plan to handle whatever life throws at me.
7. I’m a lot stronger than I ever imagined- Before I stopped drinking, I was concerned about how people would take it. I don’t eat red meat or pork, I don’t drink Coca-Cola or Pepsi or any dark sodas, I hate goat cheese… I feel like there’s quite a few things I DO eat, but anytime someone gets hung up on what I don’t consume, it becomes a huge thing. If I added no alcohol to that list, would it even be worth it for me to step outside and interact with other human beings? The answer is yes. Months ago, I had a guy on a Bar Crawl who was calling me out every step along the way, he asked me if he could get me a drink but then didn’t bring anything back because I had asked for a water, he asked me where the nearest Casino was to Nashville (and even to this day) I have no idea. He made a snarky comment, “well then what do you even do?” And I responded back to him, “Gee- it sounds like I don’t do anything!” and I kept walking. The truth is, that person isn’t for me and I’m not for him. And that’s okay. I sleep soundly at night, and I haven’t skipped a beat since that guy left Nashville. I have been able to overcome snarky comments, or people having pre-conceived notions about me. All I’m trying to do is love my family and friends and put a roof over my head. Beyond that, people can have their own issues and I won’t let it bother me.
8. You can find new, or additional, friends in the non-drinking community- I will touch on this is a more in-depth blog post as well but you can always expand your friend group! You don’t have to leave your current one- unless it’s toxic and it’s not a safe environment. Otherwise, one of the best things I’ve done within the past year has been getting out and meeting other people. I’ve lived in quite a few different places in my adult life (Albuquerque, Los Angeles, South Korea, Denver and now Nashville). I’ve been lucky enough to find different groups and ways to get out. Personally, I’ve had a lot of success with getting to know my remote co-workers better, getting more involved with the Junior League of Nashville and my sorority’s alumni group. I also do different side hustles around town, and I like going to the different events Killjoy does. All of these have created positive relationships in my life, and I encourage anyone to get out and expand their circle.
9. My main driver for remaining alcohol-free is consistency- so far this year, I have had one day where I had to call out sick because I had a migraine. Have I needed to take a nap or run an errand during the day? Yes. Have I unexpectedly had to play hookie on a day where I had a bunch of work to do, but couldn’t make it out of bed because I was wildly hungover and I was just praying no one would notice? No. I love that I can show up for myself, for my work days, and for the things I signed up for.
10.  At this point, I don’t feel any pressure to drink alcohol- I think this is a big one for people who are concerned about taking the leap into the alcohol-free unknown. Maybe I just need to thank my friends for never making me feel any sort of pressure, but I truly can’t think of a time this past year where anyone has tried to get me to drink again. The only instances I can think of are a few weekends ago I was out on Broadway with my out-of-town friends and one guy was ordering a round for everyone and he was asking everyone if they wanted a shot. He got to me, and I said no and he continued onto the next person. Not a big deal. The only bigger time I can think of, is a former colleague was visiting from Denver and he’s known for being a major partier. I met up with him and his friends for brunch, and at some point during the conversation he said, “You know- I’m impressed. I’ve already asked you if you want to do drugs 5 times and each time you’ve said no”. Well A) I don’t do drugs so that’ll never sway me but B ) I think people are just asking generally, or maybe just being nice?, so they continue to ask but it won’t do anything to impact their life so why does it matter?

I will leave you with this. The other day I saw a meme come up on my Instagram feed, and it has really been resonating with me these past couple of days: “No one hits one year sober without first one hour, one day, one week. We all start the same. Keep going.”

Keep going ❤

(all of these photos were taken on my last day of drinking alcohol- March 31, 2024)